By Grace Chong Bee Yim
30th October 2016
The year was 1970. I was young and beautiful; a heart breaker to men but a headache for my mother.
I was working a clerk in an electrical shop in Sentul, Kuala Lumpur and had an active social life. Boyfriends, movies and supper every night although most of the time my two younger sisters tagged along.
Mrs Teh, my sister who was already a Baha’i, sent a ‘friend’ over to Kuala Lumpur meet me, and hopefully, will save this soul who was having the time of her life. The ‘friend’ had just completed his flight training and was a pilot in the Royal Malaysian Air Force. When he was transferred tol KL, he paid us a visit.
We dated, although to be honest - he was always late for our dates so instead of going for movies like normal couples did back then, we always ended up at the National Baha’i Center. Over the next few months, my sisters and I spent most of our time at the Baha’i Center, various Baha’i homes and firesides. Movies and boyfriends seemed very far away then.
My sister Bee Lee, one of my tag along sister, became a Baha’i not long after that. I resisted. Who is Baha’u’llah's and what is His teachings about? I came from a typical Chinese school and could not speak a word of English back then. We were taught Confucious' teachings in school. Since all spiritual teachings are the same, there was nothing new, so why should I change? On top of that, Baha’i functions were all conducted in English and most of the Baha’is in KL spoke only English. I could not comprehend all that was going on.
I remember 11th of December 1970 clearly. I was taken to the Seremban Baha’i Centre to celebrate Human Rights Day. It was also the Feast of Masa'il, where I met an old Bahai. He handed me a declaration card and asked me to sign it. I was lost, he was old, it was impolite to say no so that was the day I declared. There was no spiritual meaning to it at that time.
Over the years, I have come to understand that who I am today is the will of God and I have my late husband to thank for that. His life was short and I think the purpose of his life was to seek me out, teach me English and make me a Baha’i.
I believe that my life’s path is being planned by Baha'u'llah, not me. Nothing is planned by me. I just follow His will.
I never once consider myself as a pioneer, I didn't choose where I wanted to go. It just fell into His plan. I have very fond memories of Kuching, it was the place that I grew up spiritually. As a young bride, I knew very little of the Faith, followed Boon to Kuching and literally grew up in Dr Fozdar and Grete’s home when Boon went to Sibu for his detachment. The Fozdar’s was my second home and Grete was like a mother to me.
There I met many people my age or younger and with these many Baha’i youths, my life became busy with studying, cooking, firesides, deepening, always loads of fun and laughter. They were there to be the guinea pigs to try out my cooking and baking skills. Sometimes the food was good and sometimes bad but really nobody complained. We used to have many indigenous native Baha'is stay at our house that and from then I had learn to cook in large quantities.
In 1972, Boon was elected as a treasure to the National Spiritual Assembly. Then I had to learn accounting in order to help him with the bookkeeping. I had the opportunity to meet many pioneers who came to settle down in Sarawak. Later I was elected to the Local Spiritual Assembly of Kuching.
Looking back I realized Baha'u'llah didn't give me much choices, He was there to make sure that I learnt whatever He wanted me to learn during the short period, knowing that Boon would not be long with me.
The next posting was to Butterworth Penang. Life very much the same as in a Kuching, Boon was not a romantic and as everyone knows, he was always the center of attraction at every occasion. I got used to sharing him with the community and with everyone who crossed our path. Friends dropped by anytime of the day and I have fond memories of Uncle Naga and Ganesen who stopped by on the way to NSA meetings in KL at 2am. I remember Kantha visiting us almost every weekend on his way back to Alor Star from his teaching post in Parit Buntar. Youths from Penang and Alor Star were coming in and out of our house all the time. Sometimes this coming and going really got on my nerves and tested my patience. I supposed Baha'u'llah has His hands in it too. I had to learn to accept and welcome and love whoever cross my path (this lesson is still ongoing today).
That pretty much sums up my life as a new Baha'I, which was a learning process where I learnt to share my life with everyone. I learnt that Boon did not belong to me alone, he was loved by everyone and he loved everybody. One thing I know for sure is that Baha’u’llah prepared me for the eventuality, and the biggest lesson of detachment.
In April 1976, Boon left me & the three and thereafter was another chapter of my life.
Present Day…
I am sitting in the plane, going back to Singapore from my month long holiday, I am thinking to myself how blessed I am.
There were periods of my life which I would like to forget and bury it for good but out of those sorrowful years came two very beautiful daughters that completed my life. For many years I worked day and night to support my five children singlehandedly. Come to think about it, that was also the happiest times of my life. I had all my children by my side, we struggled, we played, we laughed, we were happy and free of the nightmare. We were free, liberated!
I have so many friends, siblings, cousins who was always there for me. If it is not His will, then whose? I always wonder.
There are a few people I would like to acknowledge if I am allowed. They shaped me into who I am today. They are the Fozdar family, Alan Tay, Murthy and the Lim's family from Klang and of course my siblings.
From an uneducated girl to who I am today... I feel inadequate as a mother and as a servant, I wish I can do better especially in serving His Cause. As a mother, I must have done right because all of them are serving in their own way and their own capacity. I am truly blessed to have them.
