My journey to the past ....PART 1,  DORIS TAN 

for the last two years, I have been thinking of the past and making an effort to trace back my journey since I became a Baha'i in 1970 December 11th.

I became a Baha'i not knowing much about the Faith, I remember I went to Seremban Bahai centre for Human Right Day celebration and an old China man gave me a card and I declared.

I got married in February 1971, no magical love story, Boon proposed and I accepted. We moved to Kuching in  early March the same year and stay till December 1972.

I was young, just turned 20 a few months ago, a new Baha'i.  Now thinking of it, my life is being planned by Baha'u'llah without me knowing. We rented a nice house in Rubber Road, 3 rooms upstairs, one downstairs, servant quarters at the back by itself, Fay was born here and surrounded and love by friends. 

Being an Airforce pilot, the basic salary is very low. We were given RM600 for rental, 50 for servant allowance and some flying allowance. We were not rich, enough. oh ya, we had to send monthly 200RM to Boon sister because she spent money for our wedding.

Doris Tan.... The first friend I met who was not a Bahai and till today still not a Bahai. She worked in Nafi, a duty free shop specially for armforecs personnels. later part of our live centred around her and her family. They adopted Boon & I, we got to meet her mum, her father left her mum and all of them for another women and didn't treat them well, no money to support them. Doris left school at very young age and took care of two younger sisters and a brother and a sick mother. Anyway, she sacrificed a lot for the family. one of Her sisters, Ronna got married and left to another state, unfortunately when she gave birth to her 2nd child, that useless husband brought a woman home. Doris flew there, pickup her sister and two kids and supported all of them. All this happen in 1971, now the two kids are grown up and to them they have 3 mothers, Doris, Shirley and their birth mother Ronna.

Doris & I met up for breakfast, Sept 2018

Doris,Shirley, Ronna & I taken in September 2018.

27th March 2025 

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To my dearest daughters,

I wanted to write about my childhood for a long long time but never get to do it because I felt inadequate. Now that I have so many encouragement from all of you, I think I will do it but not to publish.. (may be if you chance upon this after my death, if you think it is ineresting enough) then you may Publish it , but first check the spelling and the grammers. Also you may find the time and date all mixed up but you see, it has been a long time and some of the memories have been lost.

Let's see, I remember the wooden house very well, it was at the corner of the road that lead to the Siamese Kampong. We (my grandmother and her 4thf husband whom I call Ah there and me) stayed upstair and downstair was the rubber shop. My father started this shop and my grandpa who took care of the business and me.

You may ask why I stayed with my grandma instead of my parents, you see, Ah mah has so many kids, I am the 8th and she was vey sick when she was expecting me, so she left me in the hospital for whoever wanted me.(I learnt this only vey much later from a distant relative and not very sure if the story is correct) My grandma took me home and thus I am who I am today...

One of the reason why I wanted to write this is because I wanted you all the know the personn I love very very much, that is the man I called Ahthere. I seldom talk about him but each time I think of him, I can't help myself but cry, even now as I am writing this. I tried to write about him a few times but I ended up  crying. I missed him very much, more than I miss my father.

He was Malaysian Siamese, at least 20 years younger than my grandma. He was the one who took care of me...I could not remember the detail but what I remember my grandma was a gambler, she hardly cooked, what I remember was she steamed mince meet with egg for me nearly everyday, because that was the easiest to cook. AhThere could put me behind his bicycle and took me to the siamese Kampong to visit his sister every night after the shop is closed, he drank till he  got drunk. Sometimes we fell from the bicycle because he was too drunk and it was a secret between both of us,( my grandma would kill him if she find out) He pampered me, carried me and fed me till I was almost 6yrs old. my fiends used to laught at me because I still need to be carried where as they are allowed to run wild and swim at the river nearby the house.

Once I throw a tantrum because I wanted to swim in the river like all my friends, so one of the off day, he took me to the river (5 mints walk from the house but for the 6 yrs of my life, I have not been !) Then he put me in a sampang (small boat), used a bathing pail to scoop the water from the river and bath me, imagine my embaressment infront of all my friends !!!!! 

16-09-2006 1.35AM